About       Books

Your Body. Your Mind.

Relationships can be complicated. If you are worried about a relationship you are in, ask yourself the following:

Does your boyfriend/girlfriend:
  • Have a history of bad relationships or past violence; always blames his/her problems on other people; or blames you for "making" him/her treat you badly?
  • Try to use drugs or alcohol to coerce you or get you alone when you don't want to be?
  • Try to control you by being bossy, not taking your opinion seriously or making all of the decisions about who you see, what you wear, what you do, etc.?
  • Talk negatively about people in sexual ways or talk about sex like it's a game or contest?
  • Try to isolate you from your friends and family—talks up their flaws, puts them down.
Do you:
  • Feel less confident about yourself when you're with him/her?
  • Feel scared or worried about doing or saying "the wrong thing?"
  • Find yourself changing your behavior out of fear or to avoid a fight?
You are not alone. If you need help, you can call the National Domestic Violence Hotline, They have a new code for texting 22522: Text Love Is Respect with your relationship question

To speak to a peer advocate 24/7 call: 1-866-331-947 or visit

Love isn't about power and control. Abuse is about power and control.
Resources: National Teen Dating Abuse Helpline;


If you have been raped, or are in a relationship with someone who has been raped, then I urge you to read C.J. Hale's article:
12 Things No One Told Me About Sex After Rape